It hits me hard again that my cynicism has never been and never will be unwarranted.I think of this black box which spews something undesirable in response to a stimulus. I don't blame it's content for I never will know it's design neither will I blame it's creator as I think I am an agnostic. It's just the helplessness of having to live with this abstraction and not having a choice that bugs me. It may as well be this, a big boa constrictor of my insecurities slowly consuming me.